Life was coasting along smoothly.
Years in the same industry, working my ass off to help people navigate the shit life throws at them.
I'd seen it all - trauma, addiction, you name it. I was damn good at what I did.
Then, two weeks before I was to go on vacation, an email sucker-punched me: "We need to discuss your future with us."
What. The. Fuck.
I wracked my brain.
Did I screw up?
Watch porn at work?
Nope.
I showed up every day and went above and beyond. Hell, I was about to get a sweet $20,000 raise.
My boss was just as blindsided. No one had a fucking clue what was happening.
I couldn't eat.
I couldn't sleep.
The next five days were a waking nightmare, waiting for the hammer to drop in that ominous meeting.
Some dude reached out and said he'd seen this before. "They're going to cut you loose, man. Resign now, or they'll force you out. At least keep your record clean."
Rage
Confusion
Despair
I was on an emotional rollercoaster from hell.
55 years old. 9 years from retirement.
And now this shit?
I filled out that resignation paperwork in a daze.
What choice did I have?
The Brutal Reality of Getting Kicked to the Curb
Losing your job is like getting hit by a fucking freight train.
It doesn't discriminate, and it leaves a trail of destruction in its wake.
When COVID-19 sucker-punched the world, unemployment in the U.S. skyrocketed to a staggering 14.7% in April 2020. 23.1 million people lost their livelihoods practically overnight [1].
But job loss is a cruel mistress even in "normal" times. It's consistently ranked as one of life's most stressful experiences, right up there with death and divorce [2]. And it's no wonder why.
The financial gut punch can be severe, with 37% of Americans just one missed paycheck away from a financial cliff [3] and more than half lacking emergency savings to cushion the blow [4].
Then there's the emotional fallout. Losing your job can send you spiraling into depression, anxiety, substance abuse - even suicide [5].
As psychologist Dr. Arthur Goldsmith says, "Losing a job is one of the most devastating experiences many people ever face. It creates a major grief reaction and shakes the foundation of identity and self-worth" [6].
The challenges are even steeper if you're over 45, like I was.
Ageism is alive and well in the workforce, with over 60% of older workers reporting discrimination [7].
In 2019 alone, 15,573 age discrimination complaints were filed with the EEOC [8].
Getting back in the game can feel like a rigged system.
Here's the thing: for many of us, our job isn't just a paycheck. It's a core part of who we are.
Losing that, especially with no warning or explanation, is like having the rug yanked out from under your entire sense of self.
Studies have shown that job loss often leads to decreased self-esteem, self-doubt, and a loss of purpose [9, 10].
It's a perfect storm of shit hitting the fan. And if you don't find a way to weather it, the consequences can be catastrophic.
The Unexpected Twist That Flipped the Script
A strange thing happened when I thought I'd hit rock bottom.
I resigned, and it was like a weight lifted off my shoulders.
I couldn't fucking explain it.
Then my boss dropped a bombshell.
The district said I could reapply for my position. Keep my raise, keep doing what I loved.
It didn't make a damn bit of sense.
All the sadness and despair swirling inside me suddenly morphed into white-hot rage.
I was pissed. Royally pissed.
They put me through this emotional meat grinder, and now they're dangling my job in front of me like a damn carrot?
Who does that shit?
I applied out of spite. Not because I wanted to, but because I felt like I had to.
And guess what?
They pulled the rug out again, saying the transfer period had ended.
Radio fucking silence from the recruiters.
I was at a crossroads.
Keep banging my head against a wall, chasing a job that didn't give a rat's ass about me?
Or leap into the unknown?
I chose the latter.
For the first time in almost three decades, I dusted off my resume and started applying anywhere and everywhere.
It was terrifying
Exhilarating
A shot of adrenaline straight to the heart
The Long and Winding Road to Redemption
The journey from rock bottom to redemption was a wild fucking ride.
I channeled all that anger, all that hurt, into making shit happen.
I reached out to everyone I knew, gathering references and leads.
I poured my heart and soul into every application.
I tweaked my resume a thousand times.
I practiced my elevator pitch until I could recite it in my sleep.
Was it easy? Hell no.
I faced rejection left and right. The silence felt deafening. But I kept pushing.
The road was paved with obstacles, but I learned to leap over them like a fucking gazelle.
Self-doubt was a constant companion, and financially, things were tight.
But hitting rock bottom gave me a strange sort of freedom.
The worst had already happened, so what did I have to lose?
I started applying for jobs I never would've considered before.
Positions that pushed me out of my comfort zone offered room for growth.
And slowly but surely, the tide began to turn. Interviews started rolling in. Offers landed on the table.
It was like a shot of pure adrenaline when I finally landed that first interview.
I remember walking out of there feeling like I could conquer the world.
"I knew within the first five minutes that I nailed it," I told my buddy over a celebratory beer.
"It was like everything just clicked into place. I was meant to be in that room at that moment."
But the real triumph came when I turned down the second offer. It was more money, sure, but it didn't feel right.
For the first time in my life, I chose based on what I wanted, not what I thought I should do.
Looking back, I wouldn't change a thing.
Every setback, disappointment, long dark night of the soul—it all led me to where I am now.
And where I am now is exactly where I'm meant to be.
The Sweet Taste of Victory
The stars finally aligned.
I landed a gig that checked all the boxes - better pay, a friendlier environment, and room for growth. It was like hitting the jackpot.
But here's the kicker: it wasn't just about the job itself.
It was about the journey to get there
The soul-searching
The self-discovery
The newfound sense of purpose
On paper, the outcome was a resounding success.
I scored a 20% pay bump, jumped two rungs up the corporate ladder, and landed in a company with a culture that actually gave a damn about its people.
Looking back, I realized that losing my job was the best thing that could've happened to me.
It shook me out of my comfort zone, forced me to confront my fears, and ultimately led me to a more fulfilling life than I ever imagined.
The biggest lesson I learned?
Embrace the chaos.
Lean into the discomfort
Because that's where the magic happens.
Growth doesn't happen in the easy times; it happens in the tough ones.
When you're stretched to your limits, pushed to your breaking point, you discover what you're really made of.
So to anyone out there facing their own shitstorm, my advice is this:
Keep going
Keep pushing
Keep betting on yourself
Because on the other side of fear, failure, uncertainty - that's where your breakthrough awaits.
And trust me, it's worth every damn step of the journey.
The Final Word: A Testament to Resilience, Growth, and Grit
Let's take a step back and look at the big picture here.
My story, like those of others I have worked with, isn’t just about a person's journey from rock bottom to redemption.
It reminded me of the indomitable human spirit, the power of resilience, growth, and sheer fucking grit.
As I help people create their own tale of transformation.
I found myself dead center in having to write my own tale.
Have you noticed people who face the darkest moments of their lives and come out swinging?
Who took a steaming pile of shit and turned it into solid gold.
Who dealt with…
Gut-wrenching challenges of job loss
The financial strain
The psychological toll
The identity crisis
Realizing you have to…
To pick yourself up
Dust yourself off
Keep on trucking
Being reminded of gifts from life's greatest trials.
The clarity
The growth
The newfound sense of purpose.
In a world where job security is increasingly a relic of the past, where industries are disrupted overnight, and careers are upended instantly.
I’m reminded that there is always a way out, no matter how dire the circumstances or how deep the hole you find yourself in is.
A way forward.
A way to not just survive but thrive.
But it's also a wake-up call.
Confronting our complacency, limiting beliefs, and self-imposed barriers to growth is challenging.
How many of us are sleepwalking through life, stuck in the same old patterns and ruts?
I was and didn’t realize it until I lost it.
How many of us let fear, comfort, or inertia hold us back from our true potential?
I put off applying to a job that people wanted me to pursue for three years.
So, let my story be your rallying cry.
Your inspiration to take a good hard look at your own life and ask yourself:
Am I settling?
Am I playing small?
Am I letting my fears call the shots?
And if the answer is yes, let this be your invitation to take a leap of faith.
To bet on yourself, even when the odds seem stacked against you.
To chase your dreams recklessly and trust that the net will appear.
Because that's what this journey is all about.
Not just surviving the curveballs life throws your way - but using them as fuel to catapult yourself to new heights.
So go forth and embrace the chaos.
Dance in the shitstorms.
And know that your greatest challenges can become your greatest triumphs - if you dare to face them head-on.
The only question is: Are you ready to rise to the occasion?
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References:
[1] U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. (2020). The Employment Situation - April 2020.
[2] Wanberg, C. R. (2012). The individual experience of unemployment. Annual Review of Psychology, 63, 369-396.
[3] Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve System. (2020). Report on the Economic Well-Being of U.S. Households in 2019, Featuring Supplemental Data from April 2020.
[4] Prudential. (2019). The State of Financial Wellness in America.
[5] Wanberg, C. R., Ali, A. A., & Csillag, B. (2020). Job seeking: The process and experience of looking for a job. Annual Review of Organizational Psychology and Organizational Behavior, 7, 315-337.
[6] Goldsmith, A. H., Veum, J. R., & Darity Jr, W. (1996). The psychological impact of unemployment and joblessness. The Journal of Socio-Economics, 25(3), 333-358.
[7] AARP. (2020). The Value of Experience: Age Discrimination Against Older Workers Persists.
[8] U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. (2020). Age Discrimination in Employment Act (Charges filed with EEOC) (includes concurrent charges with Title VII, ADA, EPA, and GINA) FY 1997 - FY 2019.
[9] Berger, L. K. (2017). The role of career counseling in the lives of unemployed adults. Journal of Employment Counseling, 54(4), 134-145.
[10] Brand, J. E. (2015). The far-reaching impact of job loss and unemployment. Annual Review of Sociology, 41, 359-375.